As parents, we are always viewing the lives of our children as a succession of stepping stones or building blocks. We’ve been told that we should play our kids music when they are babies so that they get a head start on mental development. We’re told that we need to enroll them in the best pre-schools, to give them a head start on education. We’re told that we need to push them harder throughout elementary school so that they can get into academically “talented and gifted” programs. We’re told that we need to make sure our kids are taking accelerated courses and SAT and ACT prep courses in high school so that they can get good grades, score high on standardized tests, and get into the “right college.” We’re even told that our kids need to fill their schedules with extracurricular activities, volunteer hours, special clubs, and societies, and more—not because our kids are passionate about those things, but because this stuff looks good on college applications.

In theory, this long series of stepping stones—and the general wisdom that recommends them—are supposed to lead our children to higher-paying, more fulfilling, and all around better jobs. We figure that, if all our pushing and nagging can point our kids toward big professional opportunities, everything will have been worth it.